I always think of this Scene from Family Guy on St Pats Day.

A PUNK friend of mine got showed me his high score on the new Slayer Iphone Pinball game.

He isn't a very nice guy...

This past sunday had a GREAT new episode of Family Guy. Here is a great gif of
the scene where Stewie is trying to get out of Berlin in 1939 and steals a Nazi Outfit
from some soldiers. He finds an interesting button that they had on before he stole it.

 

 

So good

I just had to make this when I saw it.

 

 

~VIVA TRAIN THIS!~

JEEESUS KRIST what will they think of next!
My friend was looking for microSD cards on ebay and came aCROSS this
and told me "this is what you need".

More Pictures (click below links)

iBible Features

iBible Close up

iBible Package

Here is the ebay page archived to PDF as proof.

ibible.pdf (554.93 KB)

~VIVA TECHNOLOGY~

I took some pictures the week ROCK BAND came out, but never posted them.
Here they are.

First off, this might look like a NORMAL display setup BUTT it has been
"modified"

It looks like the kids that tried these out, didn't FEEL like they were accurate
and showed them who was boss.

Here is a close up of the damage, it looks like there is blood, but it was
some kind of punch or candy... I wasn't gonna try it for myself.
I can just imagin these kids getting all steamed up from the screen saying
"FAILED!!!" over and over and over again. I bet this is why busted up
the controller.

I didn't get a picture of the busted bass pedal, but I will let you
use your imagination on what it looked like. OH YEAH, the arrow is
pointing to the wire that the controller USE to use.

These kids RULED!

 

I was going through some files and found a drawing
a "friend of mine made of me a while back. I thought I
should share it with the interwebbs.

He really knows how to BURN me up.. with that
TREK shirt and the Tree branch to HANG myself.
HE WILL GET HIS!

 

Not sure if you hear the story of the GREAT Photographer in China
that took some GREAT pictures of a chump eatin it on a bike
in the rain.  This Photographer got arrested for taking the pictures
because he was waiting for it to happen. Now that is BOWL SHIT if
you ask me... he was just taking some pictures of the rain.  I loved
these pictures so much that I made that little animated Gif shown
above.  That dude was HARDCORE not to drop the umbrella.

Link to article: http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_1399668.html

 

Article Archive: bike_pothole.pdf (199.3 KB)

 

~VIVA POTHOLES~

 

You ARE WELCOME!

Made by ME:

I wish I could see the look on the face of the person the first time
they saw this finished piece of "ART" on their truck.  I wonder if this
was somebody's kid that gave them a "GIFT" of this work of art.

Click image for Large Size

I love the wolf looking straight ahead...

I saw this "TOY" one day and was thinking, "Wow! how did somebody get
that passed the toy Police?".  I did a double take when I first saw it and
was thinking of buying it, but then I thought a picture from the internet
would be just as good.  Did a search on the stores site and BAM! there
it was. Here are some archives of the page.

 

bull_craps_archive.jpg (162.36 KB)

bull_craps.pdf (153.15 KB)

 

I am sure you already know about the little Spinach issue that is happening in the US, but did you ever think how much of a hurtin that our old friend Popeye is having.  I bet his is sitting on the the john with both hands grabbing the seat (sweating and blowing his corn cobb pipe) hateing life right now.

 

Link to Article on NYTIMES.COM

PDF of Article: popeye_spinach.pdf (93.57 KB)

 

~VIVA BURGARS~

 

Here is a Laffy Taffy joke I saw to day, it RULEZ

Why did the Old Woman tie skates on the rocking chair?

*highlight below for answer*

Because she wanted to Rock and Roll.

~VIVA GLUNKAGE!~

 

If you ever had a need to crush up some bones, I think I found the perfect Tool
for the job.  I found this little number under my sink...

I am guessing the the person that was shopping for a garbage
disposal took ONE look at the name and said "SOLD!" as I would have.
I know the next time I am in the market for a garbage disposal, I will
be sure to get this Make.

 

~VIVA GRINDING BONE FOR BREAD!~

I found this nice animated gif while checking out a forum that my buddy sent me.
It was a MUST, for my "right clicker" collection.

 

Happy Friday DOT COM

Found some Epiphone/Gibson guitars for sale that made me think, "Do these companies REALLY think people will want these stupid looking guitars?".  Well I guess if they produced them, there is a market for this JUNK.  Maybe I am old SKOOOL and like the standard shapes, I didn't even like the Star Wars Themed guitars by Fernandes... so maybe it is just me.  Here are some picture so you can see for your self.

(CLICK Image FOR LARGE SIZE)

 
(CLICK Image FOR LARGE SIZE)

 

I bet these guitars sound SW33T!

Today I got an email spam message that caught my eye, because of the word BILBO.
Some spammer nerd must have just had a Lord of the Rings Weekend Marathon, and
wrote this little poem to include in his or her spam duties. "I made it a GIF file so the
crawler robots don't see the poem and begin to send more spam"

 

Well I guess the spam did it's job by making me read it.
I still don't know what AD this spam was for.

 

~VIVA BILBO AND HIS DICE BAG~

(If you don't get it... go watch ALL the Star Wars Movies)

I found an old animation device that I made when I was in computer animation school during my first quarter.
This device was made out of card stock paper and some twine. You would cut the paper in two similar size circles,
draw two things to animate, and sandwich the twine between the pieces of card stock with some glue. I created
an animated GIF of my device.

This wasn't very "COMPUTER ANIMATED" but that is what you get for $30,000 worth of education.

BLAAAAAMOOOOO is the frogs name. (wow I just realized my blog FROG was created back in 1996)

Here are two of my MOTD's for my Linux boxes, thought some may see the humor in them ASS well ASS I do.
See you can make boring stuff FUN if you put your noodle too it.

Old Skool MOTD:

New Skool MOTD:

~Viva Windows 3.11 !!!~

Here is another funny ass RIGHT CLICKER that I found in cyber space station 75. I wish I was this kid..

 

~VIVA THE INTERNETZ~

 

 

I wonder how many of you know where this quote is from...

Traveling through hyperspace isn't like dusting crops, boy!
Without precise calculations we could fly right through a star
or bounce too close to a supernova and that'd end your trip real quick, wouldn't it?

If you said NASA you are WRONG... dang nerd.

~VIVA DESTRUCTION!!!~

I was SURFING the spaces of cyberville and came across this EGGGSULANT "Right clicker" animated Gif of Will Farell playing the HELL out of his cowbell.

RULEZZZ!

 

~VIVA ANIMATED GIF ART!~

I started to pack up my gear to get ready to go home after a hard day at work and this is what I saw.

And here is a close up of what I found (highlighted in red above)

DAMN that WILL STEVENS... he will get his one day.

I get amazed sometimes on the creative ways people from my hometown of El Paso try to make money. About 5 years ago somebody in El Paso started to sell tumbleweeds on ebay. Well now some dude is trying to sell a night out in Juarez Mexico.

Ebay Post Link (link may not work)

Link to PDF of the Ebay Post

I use to go to Juarez to party when I was in High School, but DANG to pay someone to go there with... it isn't that cool. I wonder if this is a scam to pirate their kidney?

I have seen some pretty funny 0wn3d pictures and some pretty lame, so here is my first 0wn3d peice of art. I saw this picture of Germany in WWII and thought in my head, I bet when that bridge was blown up, they must have thought.... THAT CRAP IS 0Wn3d!!!

 

Click Image for Large Size

I was crushing down the toy stores for some Star Wars Figures when I saw these NEW action figure of my buddies! Check them out!!

Captain Gaza:

Click Image for Large Size

 

Hoover Pipe Leg:

Click Image for Large Size

 

Link to my Old find of Action Figures of Me and My Friends

 

My wife loves the show Sex In The City and while she is watching this show I could not help but notice how Sarah Parker looks like Dee Snider of Twisted Sister. Every time I see a part in the show where it is silent I HOPE and PRAY that she will bust out and say "I WANNA ROK!". Maybe this is why she can never find a steady boy friend in the show, I bet those guys think she looks like Mr. Snider too.

"When it's like this i feel the music shootin' through me there's nothin' else that i would rather do I WANNA ROCK!"

My pal Hoover pointed out this Church Sign Generator and here are some that I created.

 

And here is one Hoover made for me

 

Burn City again!

Click Image for Large Version

 

My not so good buddy Will Stevens did ipod burn version 2 on me. Here is a link to version 1.0 of this ipod burn. After work I was skipping to my car happy that I was going home for the day, when I pulled out my ipod and found this above lovely note attached to my device. I then looked out my car window and saw STEVENS smoking and giggling at me. He will be... he will be...

This is one of the COOLEST prices I have seen. I wish stores would change the "9.99" numbers to "6.66" like the one below.

Click Image for Large Size

VIVA SATAN!!!

Strolling down an isle at the store these little numbers caught my eye. Do we really need things to make it easier for us to get fat? Some of these devices just make me wonder... will people REALLY use these things, and will I ever see any one using them. If I ever saw somebody using one while driving, I would crash into them (I will try to T-BONE them if possible) just so I could meet them and shake their hand. Here are some pictures for your enjoyment.

Car Fat Tray:

Click Image for Large Size

Car Fat Tray Close Up:

Click Image for Large Size

French Fry Holder:

Click Image for Large Size

French Fry Holder Close Up:

Click Image for Large Size

Juice Box Holder:

Click Image for Large Size

Juice Box Holder Close Up:

Click Image for Large Size

I walked in to my office today and found this nice little bag sitting looking at me, so I installed a Secret Hidden Easter Egg.

Click Image for Large Size

Here is a close up of my little present.

Click Image for Large Size

I wonder how long it will be before this wonderful TREASURE is found! VIVA LABEL MAKERZZZ!!!

Today I walked into work, half awake, no coffee in my system, and look what I found.
Click Image for Large Size

This is a picture of my power cord for my laptop made into a nice little art peice by Carson, it looks like a nice little rope bridge.

Click Image for Large Size

I guess he is either seeking revenge for THIS LITTLE NUMBER, or maybe he just wants to make some art. Any ways here are some more pictures of my wonderful morning. Close up 1
Click Image for Large Size Close up 2

Click Image for Large Size

Glad this wasn't a Monday, I reckin' he would get his ass kicked for this.

I just pulled this KLASSIC Tech Prank on Mr. Stevens. Looks like a normal mouse until you try to use it.

Click Image for Large Size

When it does not seem to respond you flip it over and see THIS!!!

Click Image for Large Size of RUINING

This is what he gets for going for a "Smoke".

*NOTE* ***make sure you cover with marker the IR mouse Eye***

Click Image for Large Size

I was browsing a store looking for new Star Wars Figures to add to my collection when I came across the above figures. I could not believe that I found spitting images of Mike, Bobby, Me, and Carlos. I hope this toy company starts sending us come CA$H for the use of our MUGGS for these figures. It RULEZ that they spelled the word "Blocks", BLOKS. Even EYE the master of mispellings caught that. I don't think this toy is doing any positive teaching... or maybe it is.

VIVA CELL PHONE PICTURES!

Above is a first look at a new zero megaBITE secure digital card. I bet Treo owners will be JONEZZZZING over these when they are released.

VIVA HOOVERBYTES!

Click Image for Large Size

Here is an other Gosh Darn note left while I was on vacation. All I have to say is "WILLS... You will be... You will be... *Star Trek Sucks
*except the 70's versions*

I keep getting these nice little notes from friends of mine... or maybe they are hints that they really think I suck.

Thank you RobotOtron Stevenz for this one.

Here is a nice little note that a friend of mine left for me at work.

 

VIVA GAWD DAMN!!!

Here is a collection of some pictures of signs that I think are HELLarious.

Back in the days of the KOOL Normal skate boards ( Powell, Vision, Nash... wait not Nash) I use to drop in to half pipes, do some street skating, and fly off of launch ramps. Now all I can do is a hand plant, and barely land it. I tried to get back into skating about 4 years ago and found out how much abuse ankles take while skating, which made me wuss out. Here is an example of why I can't get myself back to SK8. It is in ANIMATED GIF format because I think they are a lost ART form.

VIVA B0N3Z!!!

Saw this one day and took a picture so it would last longer. This is one funny bumper sticker... most are stupid.

Click Image for Full Size While I was in Texas visiting for Christmas, I saw this Texas Style vehicle and took a picture before it jumped into hyperspace. The proof is in the picture, true stereotype Texas style with Horses and everything. Viva Texas!

Remember that old test to get in art school that magazines use to have, well I found the original model for the sketch of the pirate.

I noticed this the other day when I was sending out some bills, $6.66 for a book of stamps! I usually start to smile, make hand horns and head bang when I see the numbers 666, but this time I thought DAMN our goverment is really messed up. I really hope they (the BUSH Clan) don’t burn my VOTE this time around. VIVA SATAN

Click Image for Full Size I found a System Administrator finger puppet, it is a spitting image of me and my friends... IT EVEN HAS A PET PARROT!

picture from 12/2004 My brother in-law got the KOOLEST toy I have seen in a long time. It is a Pirat Ship, and to TOP it off the box has H4x0R words on it, check out the "KOOL TOYZ" I love the K and Z that totally RUL3ZZZZZZZZzz.

Here is what you get when fuses blow (click here) Here is some AWSOME art work that a friend of mine created... His new name will be DestructoKeegan. Looks like he might need to go get some new fuses, his were blow as the picture shows... oh yeah and maybe a new Sledge hammer. This picture is worth a... well you look for your self.

Nice article that April found on our HOME TOWN of El Paso, TEXAS. Some study done on humidity found that El Paso is the Sweatiest U.S. City. I don’t remember it being humid, I just remember DIRT DRY ASS HEAT. VIVA TEXAS!!! Link to Article

Here is another "right clicker" that was worthy to be saved to my collection of net images.

Everybody seems to think google is the GOD when it comes to the web, BUT OH YEAH...CHECK THIS out.

Click on the image for the screen shot So JUST when you think google is UNBREAKABLE (Hoover) look at THAT!... HEHEHEHEHEH suckers.

THIS DOES

 

Click HERE for Preview. I LOVE to see stuff BREAK EXPECIALLY if it is something worth a bucket of C4$H and if somebody thinks it is the koolest thing ever. YEAH!!! Thank you BitMyDonkey for the video

Finally got some bandwidth to host Helpfarm. It is back and some sites are already feeling IT. Here is an Example from the APPLE page.... CLICK FOR SCREEN SHOT

Here is some video taken by Thrawn of Getter and the Disappearing Melon. Enjoy CLICK FOR VIDEO

An Explanation of l33t Speak, 1f U d0n’T kn0w h0VV 2 R34d 1T ! ... or if you do, it still fun to read about it. Link to Explanation of l33t Speak 0wn3d

After visiting for Christmas in Texas, I noticed some thing cool on the drive back to California. Here are the number of miles from El Paso, Texas to Indio, Califorina...

Here are some books My BUDDY Los told me he was getting me for Xmas. Are there HIDDEN messages???

 

I hope I get them.

If you are looking for the Hottest kind of chile, look for this brand. It is hard to find, but well worth the time looking for it.

Here is nice picture of the kind of APPLE’s and MAC’s I would like to see everybody have.

I came a cross a Vintage 1999 Crack Rock container and the cool thing is it STILL had some crack in it. I remember when we would go through about 13 of these a day to ease the pain of long hours. I wonder if these will ever come back in fashion. Crack Box

Open Crack Box with Rocks

 

You KNOW you want them.

I was given these mints... to suck on. Pretty KOOL kandy out there.

 

Here is a nice message I got AFTER crying to one of my TEchN0 Buddies. What a SOBcg I hate Tablet PC’s

Cursing Keyboards are KOOL, I guess robots do have a mind.

WOW, these just keep on trucking in... my buddies alway try to out do themselves, here is another useful Script to add to you logon.

_____________________________________________________

net use t: \\stevens\sucks\ass
IF NOT EXIST "t:\lineto.stevensmoms" Goto ACTION2 ELSE goto ACTION1 

:Action1     
del Local-Offline*.txt
copy t:\*.txt ..\local\stevensmomshouse
for %%I in (numberinline*.txt) do (
for /F "tokens=1-6 delims=/-: " %%A in ("%%~tI") do (
set CRDATE=%%C%%A%%B
        )
)
ren numberinline*.txt newnumberinline%CRDATE%.txt 
GOTO ACTION2 
 
:ACTION2 
net use t: /delete

Here is a really cool script that one of my buddies came up with, EVERBODY will make use of it.
____________________________________________________________

if NOT exist C:\winnt\los-mom.jpg
net send /DOMAIN:listen.com Los’ mom is not accepting new clients
sleep 5
net send /DOMAIN:listen.com that beeotch is booked solid

Here is some helpful advice I got from my friend...(lets say his name is Lando)
I think he is on to something good.

~~REMEMBER THE ALAMO!!!~~

lando: you should get a green 74 pintoi
lando: paint a big ass horse on the side, all airbrushed
lando: "THE TEXAS STALLION"
lando: maybe it will show up on techmonkey.com
lando: you would be famous

I was talking to this developer once about music and playing music (I am a musician and so is he).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Me: I wish I could find a bass player to jam with.
DEVELOPER: I play bass...
ME: Yeah it is hard to find Bass players.(Then I walked away)

and that was the end of the conversation...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If you knew this EX Sun Microsystems Developer you would understand.

 

~SOME INFO THRAWN FOUND IN OUR TECH HEAVEN~

A week without Interweb is worse than divorce

A survey has concluded that techies are more traumatized by being cut off

from the net than by getting divorced or moving house.

And when something goes wrong with e-mail for a week, the experience can

be more traumatic that moving home, getting married or divorce, at least for

a third of those taking part in the survey.

Bobby Calrissian ( the CEO of Apples R Us) said to day that he feels apples are crunchier and juicier than in 1999.